Obnoxious Siblings and Talking to Girls
by Satan Abraham
Summary: Or, in other words, two things that Mondo Oowada generally had trouble with. It didn't really help when Daiya had his girlfriend bring over her much less obnoxious sister. Her much less obnoxious, kind of cute, sister with the proclamation that both of them needed to get laid. [mondo/mukuro] [daiya/junko] [oneshot] [non-despair, non-daiya death] [rated t for language]


Mondo Oowada was sick and tired of his older brother and said older brother's girlfriend.

This was partly because he didn't have a girlfriend himself, but another part of that was because Daiya's girlfriend was Junko Enoshima – a girl from Mondo's high school class, the model.

The _model._

There was also the fact that Daiya and Junko were the absolute masters of making people uncomfortable, and while Mondo supposed it was good that they didn't grope each other in public, when they were at home, it was a whole different story. Maybe it was the charm of having an older boyfriend. Maybe they just wanted to make Mondo mad. Either way, it was annoying. He'd taken to spending a hell of a long time out on his bike with the gang just to stay away from them. He hadn't really even kept up any of his friendships from high school – him and Chihiro worked out about once a week, Leon was usually busy, but could be a good friend every once in a while, but other than that…

He didn't have anything but his bike and his gang. And while he would usually be fine with that, _Daiya and Junko really got on his nerves._

Someone knocked on the door and Mondo sighed. Daiya was in the shower, and Junko was early, it seemed. It was weird that she was knocking, though, he mused as he picked his way over magazines and dirty laundry.

He opened the door to face Junko and her sister, Mukuro Ikusaba.

"Oh," Mondo said. "Wasn't expecting there to be two of you."

"Of course you weren't," Junko said, peering over his shoulder to try and find Daiya. "Where is he?"

"Shower."

"Oh," Junko said. She ducked under Mondo's arm and headed in. Mondo and Mukuro stared at each other for a few awkward moments before Mondo averted his eyes and muttered that she should come in, too.

He moved to the side that she was heading for and muttered an apology, face burning. She looked nice. She was prettier than he'd remembered – maybe she'd gotten prettier in the year that had passed since he'd graduated high school, but he had a feeling that he just hadn't paid that much attention to her. The only times he'd ever remembered talking about her was joking that her and Ishimaru should hook up.

That was because both of them were too formal at times and sat too straight in their desks. But there she was, still walking with her back straight but looking shy. If it was someone like Ishimaru, he'd be… cleaning, or something.

There was a yell from the bathroom and Junko Enoshima's high-pitched laugh. Mondo rolled his eyes. "Uh," he said, forcing his voice to stay at a normal level. "Why are you here?"

"Junko-chan said that I need… a boyfriend," Mukuro said. Her face was red as well. Mondo swallowed. His mouth was too dry. He needed some water.

"I'm going to go get some water!" Mondo said. Fuck. There it was. "D-do you want something to drink too!"

Mukuro shook her head and Mondo escaped to the kitchen. He chugged down a glass of water and, as an afterthought, grabbed two pops from the fridge. He'd get one for her, one for him, because if Junko wanted to shove him and Mukuro together, he wasn't really complaining. Although he still didn't know how to act around her.

The other three had gathered in the living room, Daiya on the armchair with Junko draped over his lap, Mukuro sitting stick-straight on the couch. He sat next to her and held out the pop.

She took it, face flushing a little. "So," Daiya said. "You decided to get someone for the little bro, huh?"

"I decided Big Sis Mukuro needed to stop moping around and get laid," Junko said. She was playing with Daiya's hair, pressing her thin fingers through it and twirling it around long fingernails. She sent Mondo a smirk. "And you said he was the same way."

Mondo felt heat flood his face and he scowled. Daiya laughed a little. "S-shut up," Mondo said. Mukuro shifted on the couch next to him. She was obviously feeling awkward. "Now all ya did was make it awkward."

"Good!" Junko said brightly. "You'll have that in the back of the head while you try and make small talk. You'll be noticing all of her curves and you'll be noticing all of his muscles, and eventually I'm pretty sure you'll be all over each other."

With that, she kissed Daiya obnoxiously, keeping eye contact with Mondo the entire time.

He stood up almost violently, a bit of the pop spilling over the sides of the can and turning to Mukuro. "Let's go outside," he said. He heard Junko's laugh behind them as they left to stand out in front of their house. He kicked some junk out of the way to make room for them to sit down.

She sat down next to him, but he hadn't quite made enough room, and they were pretty close. Close enough for him to be nervous about it, that was for sure. He cleared his throat, but when she looked at him, he realized that he really had nothing to say. So he licked his lips and attempted to make some sort of small talk.

And Junko was right, because he was noticing all of her curves.

"What've you been doing," he said. "Since high school."

If his voice was raising, she didn't say anything. He'd know when he went inside – if Daiya looked at him and snickered, he was too loud. If Daiya grunted at him as he passed, he'd done nothing wrong.

She half-shrugged. "Nothing really. You?"

"Eh," he said. "Hung out with the gang. Tried to get a fucking job, but it's _hard."_

"What kind of job are you looking for?" she asked, looking him over. "I might know a guy."

"I ain't gonna do anything that requires hunting people down," he said. She'd been a soldier, right? But she was around Junko all the time, who was… well, she was a model, but she was also really… well, he wasn't quite sure what kinds of things she was into, but a lot of it seemed highly illegal. And it wasn't like Mondo was overly concerned with laws and shit like that, but he didn't want to do something so bad it landed him in jail, without a way to actually make something of his life. "Nah, I've got other shit I wanna do before I get too old. Before I look back and say, 'shit, I spent all of my entire shitty fucking life doing absolutely nothing', you know? I don't wanna look back and see that I've just… broken stuff down instead of doing something that could do something for me."

He realized that he'd been talking almost normally and glanced at her. His face heated up again as he noticed her leg, which was mostly bare and not bad-looking in the least, so close to his that she was nearly pressing up against him.

"Junko-chan will tease me if I don't get a kiss out of this," Mukuro said. She looked a little nervous, but that was nothing to what Mondo was feeling at the moment. His heart was jumping up into his throat, and he had to swallow a few times before he could answer.

"U-uh," he said. He had kissed a few girls before, but he'd been drunk and they'd been all over him and there hadn't been much leading up to it. He hadn't really had time to worry about how sweaty he was getting and if he'd actually brushed his teeth that morning and how he probably smelled like grease and sweat, because he was really sweating a lot.

She closed her eyes and kissed him. Just a peck, really, but enough to make his face get even redder. She swallowed. He swallowed.

"We could go out sometime," he said. His voice cracked.

"Maybe a double date with them," she said. He groaned. She laughed a little. "I'm going to go get Junko-chan."

She stood up and hesitated. "It was nice," she said.

He didn't trust himself to say anything, so he just shrugged.

"Well," she said. "Bye."

He nodded, and after hesitating a bit more, she hurried inside.

He leaned against another piece of junk and stared up at the sky.

He wasn't totally sure if he could call that a success, but it was definitely more female contact than he'd had lately. And it hadn't been bad, either. At one point he was pretty sure he wasn't yelling or anything, so that was good.

Maybe Junko would be tolerable if she brought Mukuro around more often.

* * *

**This was requested by an anon on Tumblr, who wanted a Junko/Daiya + Mondo/Mukuro. They said double date, but it sort of turned into this anyway, so there's that! I'll be writing and posting oneshots until June, and I'm fairly certain I'll be updating everything else regularly in July.**

**I got pushed back a little bit because a draft for some original work took me almost two months instead of the one month I was expecting it to, but I'm back for these few days to write and post oneshots! If you want to request something, I can't promise it will get done soon, but you can always go over to my tumblr (goddessofthedawn) and send me an ask!**


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